I guess what I’m trying to say is, my internship is proving to be quite the
adventure, and I am its captain, sailing the seven deadly seas of Craigslist.
Maybe I should elaborate. Ever seen The Craigslist Killer? Well add it to
your instant queue. You’ll never want to use Craigslist again.
Personally, I haven’t seen it, and that’s why I met
a guy in the parking lot of the Holton Walmart Tuesday morning to trade a
Wonderwall entertainment projector for a 27” flatscreen TV. His was the 3rd
of several “too good to be true” offers, which also included a 750GB external
hard drive and a “limited edition” Tippman paintball “marker.”
But back to the flatscreen – my brother and I pulled
up next to the silver minivan and carried the projector over to the other side
to meet the man. The most compelling detail of the encounter (besides his
incredibly friendly demeanor) was his shirt – one that I would rather not
elaborate on. Let’s just say it was… “totally inappropriate.”
I had fielded his offer earlier that morning with massive anxiety – having responded hours later to his initial text, sure that the deal was off and he’d moved on with his day. Not so! He responded with interest, ready to trade his “32” flatscreen tv and a #20 home depot 1/24 scale die cast piggy bank” for my projector. You may have noticed he provided more information about the piggy bank than the TV. Amusing, if not a little disconcerting.
We made the trade and while still standing outside his open minivan door, he said “have you seen that movie about Craigslist?” The only one that came to mind was the aforementioned Craigslist Killer, and I recognized this as a perfect segue into shoving me in his van and peeling out. I slowly side-stepped around the back bumper as he further elaborated on the plot of Craigslist Joe (billed as “Zach Galifianakis presents…”). Needless to say, I’m adding the DVD to my Amazon shopping cart as we speak.
As he and I speak, not me and you. You could be
reading this months after the fact. Years even. How could I know?
I shut my trunk on the trade and as they say, “that’s
that!” I wave goodbye to my new friend and the coolest trader I’ve met (to
date).
A few minutes late to work now, I prepare to make my
second trade of the day. That old antique unicycle is prepared to go and my
cousin Jared (also an employee of my internship’s host firm) is prepared to
find out “what [he] can break” trying to ride it. I believe the list of bones
donated to similar causes already includes his collarbone and small toe (though
he did not specify which foot).
So now I’m standing in the Sunflower parking lot
trading a (an?) unicycle for an HP printer.
I can say with unbridled certainty that this is not
the most bizarre incident to take place in the Sunflower parking lot.
And it all started with a single promotional
product.
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